Kids are taught from a very young age to come to adults whenever something is wrong. As they grow up, however, they need to learn to understand the difference between telling when something is wrong and tattling about everything that annoys them. This involves educating them on the difference between telling and tattling and giving them the skills needed to handle personal conflicts.

Define the Difference Between Telling And Tattling

Explain to your child, in simple words, the difference between asking a grown-up to help when something or someone needs protection and tattling on someone whenever something does not go their way.

This is all comes down to the concept of safety. Is someone acting in a way that will cause harm to someone or something else? If yes, informing a grown-up is not tattling, but telling, because the other person’s actions could be harmful. On the other hand, if there is no danger or immediate threat, running to a grown-up to inform them of whatever is happening will amount to tattling.

Explain Why Tattling Is Wrong

It can be very confusing for a child to suddenly be instructed not to run to a grown-up to find a solution for every problem since they have always been told to tell grown-ups everything. After explaining to them the difference between telling and tattling, tell them why tattling is wrong.

By involving an adult and asking them to intervene whenever another child is doing something wrong, they are taking away a chance from the other child to correct themselves. They might not know that they were doing something wrong, and being told on will just make them embarrassed.

However, young children may find empathy complex to feel and understand, and so it is hard for them to understand the concept of other people feeling bad. Until they become old enough to understand social norms and develop empathy skills, the most effective way to get them to understand is with guidelines and rules. It is much easier for them to understand things when they are laid out in black and white, so the best course of action is to make a rule against tattling.

Teach Them to Handle the Situation Themselves

 Kids are not always the best communicators and lack the ability to resolve conflicts on their own, which is why they run to an adult whenever they need intervention. However, helping your child learn to voice his feelings in a way that solves his problem is not a hard task. When a child ‘tattles’ to you, tell them that this is an issue they need to address themselves. Give them suggestions on how they can solve the problem and words that they can use to get their point across. Once the child sees that they can resolve the situation on their own, they will be more likely to tackle similar problems by themselves.

However, it is important to also teach your child that if they fail to handle the situation themselves despite trying, it is perfectly okay to approach you. Make sure that they know to come to you in case they ever feel unsafe or get hurt.

Tiny Terrors provides in-home parenting and behaviour support services to instill a positive attitude in kids. You can contact us at 1300 00 14 14 to explore more about our services.